Social Media: From “Frenemy” to “Friend”

If you were to catch me outside class, odds are I’m on my phone and on social media. I would say the same goes for my peers, as most of the time we feel compelled to see what Lizzo just posted on Instagram or what our friend just sent us on Snapchat. 

     However, despite all the joy and entertainment, it may bring us, social media can sometimes negatively impact our self-esteem and alter our self-image (how we see ourselves). 

     Not too long ago, I was talking to one of my friends, (she shall remain unnamed), and she told me that she had deleted all her social media as she felt that it was affecting her mental health. 

     With her permission, she has allowed me to share her main reasons as to quitting social media: 

1. “It’s just a game of whose life is better; it makes me feel bad when I am supposedly living my life happily.”

2. “I feel like it’s rude to unfollow someone I know.”

3. “It’s hard seeing people hang out and know that I wasn’t invited.” 

4. “Seeing models and people skinnier than me, make me feel bad about my body.”

     In my friend’s case, social media was acting as her “frenemy” (a combination of friend and enemy). She was enjoying posts and updates from her favorite celebrities and close friends, but she had reasons as to how social media was negatively affecting her (see list above). 

     There are many other reasons why people may want to quit social media-which is perfectly fine; social media isn’t for everyone. But sometimes just removing something completely from your life isn’t the answer. 

     Think of social media as just one example of something in our lives that we can sometimes struggle with. The solution isn’t to look at all our problems and give up; or in this case, delete the app. The key to thriving in life is to acknowledge our problems, deal with them, and keep living our best lives. Here are a few steps on how to get social media to go from being your “frenemy” to your friend:

1.  Unfollow toxic people. 

Don’t follow someone you don’t want to follow! Unfollow anyone and everyone who isn’t contributing to a positive experience on social media, you are on social media to enjoy yourself and connect with others. 

2. Stop caring about the number of likes and followers.

Your value is not measured by how many likes you have on your post or how many followers you have. They’re just numbers and they have no significance at all. 

3. Follow people/accounts that do bring you joy. 

Surround yourself with positivity and people who bring you joy. Whether it be to celebrities, friends, family, or even a profile full of funny dog videos! Replace all the negativity and toxicity on social media with positive and favorable accounts. A great example is how people tend to follow accounts that spread awareness for a certain cause-this consequently tends to bring a sense of unity! Especially applying to those who struggle with mental health and certain disorders/diseases, people tend to feel less “alone” and more confident. 1  

 

4. Stop comparing yourself to everyone else!

Despite how challenging it may be, we need to stop comparing ourselves. Social media is not meant to serve as a pedestal. Social media is not meant to serve as a competition of “who’s life is better”. Consider that people tend to only post the happy things occurring in their life, no one posts about everything (both good and bad) that occurs in their life. No one’s life is perfect. 

References

Nauert, Rick. PhD. (2018) Social Media Can Connect Those with Severe Mental Illness. PsychCentral.com