Sí Se Puede! A Guide to Self-Esteem and Motivation for First Gen Students

Being a first-generation Mexican-American student can take a toll on someone. There are high expectations that come with being a first-generation student. Some people, including me and perhaps you as well, can become unmotivated by these lofty expectations. It's strange since I would have thought that my desire to avoid disappointing my parents would be enough to motivate me to work. This lack of motivation then feeds into low self-esteem. This constant state of dwelling on oneself is not very efficient so let’s talk about it more. 

How do Self-Esteem and Motivation Work Together? 

Low self-esteem can be triggered by many different events and it can come and go in waves. Everyone has been affected by low self-esteem, whether it was because of someone making fun of the sparkly light-up shoes you wore in elementary school, which now makes picking a pair of shoes in the morning before class the hardest decision of your life, or because you failed your first college exam because you had no idea what to expect. Low self-esteem can give people the mindset of “I’m not good enough. There is no point in trying.” This lack of motivation leads us to persuade ourselves that we won’t succeed in whatever it may be. This can then lead to a self-fulling prophecy, where we predict or expect something (like bad performance on an exam) and in return, our beliefs come true because we told ourselves it would happen (maybe our negative thoughts got in the way of studying or thinking clearly during the exam). 

The Importance of a Good Self-Esteem and Motivation 

A healthy sense of self-worth allows us to receive love, respect, and trust from ourselves and from our parents, partners, and friends. This is crucial when establishing stable relationships. Researchers have found a positive correlation between low self-esteem and depression. Being in a state of depression causes us to encounter mood-congruent memories, or memories that are in line with how we are currently feeling. In this case, because we are in a depressive state, we are more likely to keep falling down the rabbit hole as we are constantly thinking about the time our dog died or the time we felt alone because our best friend moved across the country. On the contrary, people with strong self-esteem tend to be happier and less stressed. Because we know we are capable of succeeding, we are motivated to participate in social situations and study for exams in order to maintain this positive self-perception. But without motivation, we will find ourselves living the same negative cycle because there are no goals to be achieved. 

How to Strengthen Self-Esteem and Motivation 

As cheesy as it sounds, give yourself a daily pep talk! Part of developing yourself is establishing the roles you play. The cliche phrase “fake it until you make it” can also be tweaked to say “fake it until you become it.” When we act a part we will gradually become it. If we tell ourselves that we are good enough, we are worthy of love, we are smart enough, then we will eventually speak it into existence. It might be a little awkward at first but patience is key! 

One way to build motivation is by creating a vision board. Visualizing your goals helps with decision-making and values that will lead you to where you want to be. It can be as simple as creating a Pinterest board! For this technique to be the most efficient, I recommend creating a tangible vision board that can be seen every day. 

Talking to yourself kindly will help with both self-esteem and motivation. Telling ourselves that we can do it, or as I like to say in Spanish sí se puede will help build our confidence and capability of accomplishing something. Try to avoid using words that belittle yourself such as stupid, dumb, or not good enough. Instead of constantly criticizing yourself, be your own cheerleader! It is important to note that building good self-esteem and consistent motivation will take effort and time. Building good habits might be challenging at first, but all good things come with time. Like I said before, sí se puede !